Ballot Monkeys

1Episode 1 #1.01

2Episode #1.2

With nine days to the general election Kevin makes another sporting comparison but his colleague Charlotte is concerned about his mood swings, fearing he is bipolar. Cynical Martin gets into an argument with team member Baz, who believes that the prime minister should stand down in favour of colourful London mayor Boris Johnson. Kate rings the BBC to complain about the minimal air-time given UKIP - and for tickets for the Antique Road Show - and is amused by composer Mike Read's new song for her party. Jack is irritated by American spin doctor Melanie, who wants him to pitch his ideas to a gonk doll, and the irritation gets worse when he learns about her large fee. As ever nobody seems very sure about anything.

3Episode #1.3

Jack is still at odds with Melanie over their differing opinions of Ed Miliband and his own hatred of Twitter whilst Martin again crosses swords with Baz for the latter's support for Boris Johnson and decries the lack of A list celebrities backing the Tories. A role play for journalists also goes wrong. Kevin's reactions to the polls get more and more bizarre, scaring Charlotte as he shuts himself in the toilet and refuses to come out. Kate, having staggered her team with her ignorance of popular television shows, reluctantly agrees to driver Obi being interviewed by UKIP leader Nigel to show his lack of racism - though this is aborted when Obi proves to be an illegal immigrant. In the event all parties are pushed off the front page by the birth of a royal baby.

4Episode #1.4

To the annoyance of deputy Gerry Kate hits it off with Obi's lazy replacement Mick, who shares her reactionary views. Kevin's behaviour gets more outlandish, fabricating bizarre lies about the Tories before admitting he is sleeping in the bus after splitting with his wife. Martin and Baz have yet more disagreements, causing canvasser Siobhan to quit, claiming that they are both exploiting her. On the Labour bus equally disillusioned Christine really loses it and launches a tirade against two innocent Green party members who have double-booked a hall. The one thing that unites all parties now is their total lack of unity.

5Episode #1.5

Martin is not happy when Baz goes behind his back to his friends at the gutter press to lampoon the opposition, resulting in obscene Tweets against the Tories with Martin finally learning whether or not Baz is truly a spy for Boris Johnson. As disillusioned as Martin, Jack is outraged when Melanie also backs a ridiculous smear campaign which leads to a showdown between Melanie and Christine over the fate of the gonk. Gerry Stagg, appalled at Kate's view that Britain is run by a mafia of gays and Jews, quits in disgust but Charlotte has rather more trouble in trying to persuade the homeless Kevin to leave the bus. With one day to go before the election there does not seem to be much positivity in the air.